Couples Therapy

Your relationship feels like it turns you into a wild animal.

Some days it’s as if you and your partner are lions, fighting over a hyena carcass when really you are talking about basic domestic issues.

Yep. We get most triggered by our intimate partners.

And when we get triggered, we revert to our limbic or mammalian brain, losing touch with ration and foresight and, in some ways, becoming more animalistic.

You’re not crazy, and you’re not alone.

See, when two people jump into a relationship, they are bringing so much more than their excitement and enthusiasm into the room.

Inside are suitcases of past wounds, beliefs, and sometimes, old relational trauma. When our old suitcases are opened, we get triggered and go “animalistic.”  

The more luggage we have inside, the harder it can be to work through normal arguments like who does the dishes or whether to attend a social event.

If you add in a life-threatening traumatic event, things get even more wonky.

When addiction, chronic illness, cancer, or loss rupture a relationship, it can be even harder to feel connected and heard by your partner.

There’s a Path to Resolution

It doesn’t have to be like this anymore though. That is why I practice neurobiological-based couples therapy, therapy that includes a deeper understanding of the nervous system and the brain and how it behaves “in relationship.”

My approach is based in PACT and Hakomi which both focus on experiential learning over cognitive “understanding.”

That means that you will both go home with a visceral sense of what else is possible in your relationship and actual tools in your tool-belt.

Feel seen and understood in your relationship.

I am here to help you navigate these everyday interactions and to go underneath them.

Through our work together, you will understand each other’s baggage and gently unpack it together.

When wounds happen in relationship, they must be healed in relationship.

So particularly when things feel rocky, try this reframe: you have an incredible opportunity to heal with each other, to become better as individuals, and to become a resilient and brilliant couple.

When I work with couples, my focus is on creating a foundation of true safety and security, so your relationship can grow as much as you want.

As safety is created and you truly understand your partner and their internal luggage, so much more becomes possible.

Call (970) 528-0378 today to schedule a free consultation.